


It's Hot Outside and You're Not Helping

by orphan_account



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Eren being a dork, Eren has questionable thoughts, Eren's really fucking cute, Fluff, Levi really needs to stop encouraging Eren by being shirtless all the time, Literally just 2k words of Eren trying to ask Levi out, M/M, Pining!Eren, about licking, and Levi's abs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-17
Updated: 2016-08-17
Packaged: 2018-08-09 10:16:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,580
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7797910
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eren fumbles some words around, trying to piece together an acceptable sentence in his head, but the only words he can think of at the moment are, “Fuck, he’s hot,” and also, “I want to lick him.” Both of which are highly inappropriate for the situation, and Eren’s starting to question if he has a licking fetish.</p>
            </blockquote>





	It's Hot Outside and You're Not Helping

**Author's Note:**

> Have something ridiculous because there's too much angst in the fandom as of late.

“Fuck off, Mikasa,” Eren snaps, walking faster to escape her ridiculousness.

“Come on, Eren. You’ve been ogling Levi Ackerman’s ass all day. Just ask him out.” She says it flippantly like it’s no big deal, adjusting her scarf while she’s at it, and mortification makes Eren’s face flare red.

“I was _not_ ogling his ass!” By now, Eren’s sure that he’s the same colour as a tomato. And by god, he never though that it would be _Mikasa_ out of all the people to bring it up. Sure, Levi’s got an eight pack. And sure, Levi’s a hot piece of ass. But that’s all he is: an _ass._ Every time that Eren sees him, he’s pissy. Not that Eren’s really allowed to say anything about being pissy. Some may argue that Eren’s being very pissy right now.

“It’s true,” Armin quips in, and Eren turns to look at him incredulously as if to say, _‘traitor’._ He almost stomps his feet with frustration until he realizes how childish that will look, and also how childish he’s already being.

Resigning to his fate—and his very obvious crush on Mr. Ass—he kicks a stray pebble, groaning at how horrible his friends are. “It’s not like he’ll ever notice me anyway,” he sulks, ignoring Armin’s sympathetic pat on the shoulder and Mikasa’s frown. “I’m just a nobody in an ocean of nobodies. Not to mention that I hang out with a mushroom nerd and a crazy mom-sister.”

“Hey!” Armin exclaims while Mikasa just rolls her eyes.

“You also hang out with a horse, a potato fanatic, and a cynical, bald kid,” she supplies instead of getting offended, and Eren snorts. Even Armin lets out a good natured chuckle because, let’s face it, everyone in their friend group thinks Jean looks like a horse.

“Don’t forget the crazy lesbians,” Armin adds, and Eren and Mikasa both nod in agreement.

 “I have questionable choices in friends,” Eren shrugs, still frowning as majority of his thoughts remain around Levi, and how he saw Levi shirtless yesterday on the field, and how fucking delicious he looked whilst bathed in sunlight, and— _wow, Eren, chill_. Did he really just think of the assholey of all asses as _delicious?_ Not that it’s not true, but _seriously._

“You’ve never been good at decision making,” Armin says, and Mikasa nods in agreement. Eren nods back half-heartedly, mind preoccupied and they turn the corner and spot a group of people by the bleachers of the school field.

 _Fuck._ Eren’s heart skips a beat as a familiar raven-haired senior comes into view, toweling off his face. How does toweling off one’s face look so attractive? Eren doesn’t think he’ll ever know, but damn is he glad for the view.

His breath hitches as his eyes travel further down Levi’s body, realizing that he’s shirtless and glistening. Although Levi’s broad and toned, he’s not stocky. Rather, he’s sharp and defined, with high cheekbones and soft hair that Eren just wants to stroke. And fuck, fuck, _fuck_ , those abs. Eren wants to bend down, pray, and lick them.

“—ren? Eren?” Armin shakes Eren’s shoulders, amused, and Mikasa shakes her head. She gives him a little push, grumbling all the while, and Eren loses him balance, stumbling.

“Hey!” He exclaims, but she ignores his annoyance, completely, continuing with the task at hand.

“Go talk to him,” she encourages, although her face is arranged in a scowl. “If he hurts you, I’ll just beat him up.”

“Mikasa!” Eren protests, waving his arms frantically. She doesn’t understand that every time he goes in front of Levi, he wants to touch the senior’s skin and hair and lips and— _god, this is becoming a real problem._ Digging his heals into the dirt as Armin and Mikasa both begin to drag him, he whispers harshly, just loud enough so that Mikasa and Armin can hear. “Please. He’ll fuck me over!”

Blankly, Mikasa drawls, “I thought that was what you wanted.”

Whining, Eren hides his burning face, trying to forget what she said. “Oh my god.” He can’t believe this is happening. _Why me?_

“Hanji, Erwin,” Armin greets enthusiastically, letting go of Eren in favour for bounding towards the three seniors. Hanji, Erwin, and Levi all look at the three juniors coming towards them.

 

“What,” Levi looks up, perplexed. The blond coconut is smiling and waving, greeting Hanji and Erwin like they’re old friends, whilst the dark-haired girl is dragging a brunette behind her. It’s quite the confusing, and amusing sight. Said brunette looks ready to bury his face in the ground, and— _oh._ The brunette looks up, and Levi catches his breath. He’s cute. _Shit, I’m so fucking shallow._

Levi thinks that he should probably know their names because he’s definitely seen them around before, but he can’t really remember them.

“Armin, Mikasa, Eren,” Erwin smiles kindly. “What brings you here?”

Levi quirks his head, mulling the new information around. Armin is definitely the name of the blond one, and Mikasa, if he remembers correctly, is the girl. So Eren is the brunette’s name. Levi stores the information away, knowing that he won’t forget it now that he’s interested, and he drinks in the sight before him, setting the towel he was using earlier down.

Eren’s face, already quite red, flushes even deeper, and Levi can’t help but wink. And _no,_ he totally isn’t showing off to impress Eren, but judging by Hanji and Erwin’s knowing looks, he isn’t fooling anyone. Not that anyone can really blame Levi because Eren’s kind of hot.

And by kind of, he means really hot.

“Just here to say hi,” Armin responds to Erwin’s question, beaming. Hanji smiles, ruffling Armin’s hair, and all three of them start to talk about some AP class shit.

Sighing in annoyance, Levi turns to Mikasa and Eren. “I get that the blond coconut’s here to converse with my friends about some smart shit, but why are you two here?”

Eren looks down at the floor, pouting, and Mikasa shoves him so hard that he almost stumbles into Levi’s chest. _Almost._ It’s a shame because Levi would definitely not have minded the contact.

“Eren’s here to talk to you.” She’s blunt and cold, eyes narrowed, and Levi notices how Eren swallows, tanned skin turning pinker and pinker by the second.

Finally, after what feels like forever, he looks up, and Levi appreciates the sight immensely, feeling his heartbeat accelerate. Eren’s lashes are unfairly thick and long, dusting his cheeks as he looks up shyly. His eyes are a colour that looks green, blue, gray, and gold at the same time. _How the fuck—_

“Hi,” Eren waves, smile looking more like a grimace. “Um…I’m Eren. And you’re Levi,” he pauses, flusters, the puts his face into his hands. “And oh my god, of course you know your own name. Mikasa, can we go?”

Mikasa shakes her head. “You’re on your own,” she says, ignoring Eren’s betrayed expression, and she makes quickly her way to Hanji, Erwin, and Armin, not even bothering to glance back.

“You can’t just drag me here and then leave me to my own devices!” Eren calls out to her, but she ignores him, opting to engage with the nerds in a pointless conversation. “Armin? You too?”

Armin sends Eren an apologetic look, and Levi almost feels sorry for Eren. He sympathises with being abandoned by friends, and he sends Hanji and Erwin a glare just to prove it.

“Shitty friends,” he comments, and Eren grumbles, kicking the grass.

“Tell me about it.” He sighs, looking up again, only to look down once he catches Levi’s eyes.

 

It’s really not Eren’s fault at all that he’s so easily flustered by Levi. Levi’s intimidating without trying, and Eren’s poor little heart flutters every time he catches sight of the gray, heavy-lidded eyes. Some may argue that Levi’s impassive, but Eren thinks he’s actually very expressive. And Levi’s hair is so dark and silky looking, and his skin looks so smooth. And His fucking washboard abs and strong arms and chest, and _fuck me. Literally please._

It’s not helping that Levi’s shirtless, and gorgeous, and could probably lift Eren up with one arm if he really wanted to. It also doesn’t help that Levi looks ready to devour him. Not that he would mind at all, in fact, he would probably beg to be devoured by Levi. _You’re hopeless,_ his brain sighs, and Eren scowls.

He fumbles some words around, trying to piece together an acceptable sentence in his head, but the only words he can think of at the moment are, _“Fuck, he’s hot,”_ and also, _“I want to lick him.”_ Both of which are highly inappropriate for the situation, and Eren’s starting to question if he has a licking fetish.

 _Ew._ He crinkles his nose at the thought, not believing how bad he has it for the senior.

“You okay?” Levi asks, and Eren’s stomach flutters for _no reason at all._ It’s probably because Levi’s talking to him, and he wants to bury his face in the ground, or maybe punch it, or maybe both. Fuck everything.

Eren swallows and manages to squeak out a, “Fine,” before shooting both Mikasa and Armin a harsh glare. Not that they’re looking at him, but it makes him feel better anyway. Traitors.

“You look like you’re about to keel over and die.” Levi’s eyebrows are raised, and a pink tongue darts out to lick his parched lips. Was that supposed to be erotic? Because god damn, Eren finds it erotic, and attractive, and everything in between. And Levi’s not wrong because Eren literally thinks he might just keel over.

“It’s just because you’re really hot,” he blurts out loudly, and oh god. _Oh my fucking god, kill me. Have mercy. Jesus fucking Christ, this is the worst._

Hanji, Erwin, Armin, and Mikasa all turn around to stare at Eren, and Levi just looks amused. Eren knows that Armin’s trying not to laugh, and it seems that even Mikasa’s enjoying his pain. Erwin looks like he can’t even be bothered to figure out what Eren and Levi are talking about, and Hanji actually starts cackling.

Really, Eren probably won’t mind being struck by sudden lighting. Maybe he can make a run for it now before Levi kills him, or maybe he should just resign to his fate and accept death graciously. After all, being killed by Levi probably won’t be the worse way to die. At least Eren will have a nice view before he passes on.

“Thanks,” Levi huffs, effectively cutting off Eren’s rampaging thoughts, and Eren blinks.

“What?” He asks, just because he’s not sure that he heard correctly.

“I said thanks.” Levi, surprisingly, looks almost flattered, and Eren swears that he’s flexing on purpose. “And you’re not bad yourself.”

Eren blinks again, mouth opening slightly. “Huh?” He’s not sure how much redder his face can get, but he’s pretty sure that all the blood in his body has gone to his face, and his chest and stomach really need to calm down because _what’s with the butterflies?_ His heart won’t stop speeding up, up, up, and Eren actually presses a hand to his chest to make sure that it didn’t beat out his chest.

“Is this always how you accept compliments?” Levi’s foot is tapping on the grass, and Eren marvels at how nice Levi’s calves look every time he moves. And then he registers what Levi said, and he looks back up to the senior’s face.

“Ahahaha, no,” Eren smiles, beaming up at Levi because he never though that he would ever be complimented by the older, _hot-as-fuck_ male. And what happened to Levi being as _asshole?_ Because Eren certainly seems to have forgotten his previous accusations. “I just, you’re just, um, yeah.”

“Cute,” Levi mutters, probably to himself, but Eren hears anyway.

“You think I’m cute?” Maybe he’s a little too hopeful, but a man—err, boy—can dream.

He watches a little too intently as Levi swallows, Adam’s apple shifting, and swallowing has never looked so sexy. It’s probably unhealthy to praise someone so much, but Eren really can’t help it. Levi’s just really attractive and Eren’s just really pathetic. “Well yeah, that’s what I said,” Levi mutters, glowering at the floor.

If this is Levi being embarrassed, Eren thinks it’s cute. And also hot. And also a little bit funny, but just a little.

“Thank you.” Eren feels a little less embarrassed now, and a whole lot more confident. After all, it’s not every day that he’ll get the opportunity to talk to Levi Ackerman, so he should probably make the most of it. He needs to ask Levi out before he’s old and gray, after all. _Just blurt it out._ Eren takes a deep breath, inhaling and exhaling, before counting down in his head. _Three, two, one,_ “Can we go on a date?”

The words leave his mouth in a flurry, and Eren tries not to look too optimistic as he shifts his weight from his heals to his toes, and then back again. Looking for something to do with his hands, he clenches and unclenches his fingers. He doesn’t know what he’s hoping for really, and he doesn’t know why he thought this would be a good idea, but he knows that it’s too late to take the words back and re-evaluate his life. Maybe he should’ve stayed home today, or knocked Mikasa and Armin out before they managed to drag him into this. Speaking of his friends, why aren’t they helping him at all? He glance over at them nervously and notices that they’ve long stopped paying attention to Eren and Levi’s conversation, and are probably all discussing AP Calculus or some other class that Eren’s definitely not in.

It feels like forever before Levi puts Eren out of his misery. “Sure,” Levi says, and he says it so simply as if it’s no big deal at all. But it _is_ a big deal, and it takes about ten seconds for it to actually sink into Eren’s brain before he’s grinning so wide that Levi actually looks taken aback.

He doesn’t know what to say because his heart is pounding too loudly to think, and the butterflies in his stomach have apparently reproduced and created more butterflies. He feels light, and fluttery, and he stares at Levi in wonder because, _wow,_ he looks really attractive when he’s exasperated.

“Oi, snap out of it. You need my phone number, right?” Levi snaps his fingers in front of Eren’s face, and Eren shakes his head, trying to focus.

“Right, right, sorry,” he grins sheepishly, getting out his phone and giving it to Levi. “Just type in your number and—”

“I know how to use a fucking phone.” Rolling his eyes, Levi types in his number before handing the phone back to Eren. “I’ll see you soon. Text me the details for the date or whatever. As long as it’s not coffee, it should be fine.” And then, muttering to himself, “I fucking hate coffee.”

Eren can’t help but smile even wider, if that’s even possible, and he can feel himself growing fonder by the second. He doesn’t understand why he has such explosive feelings for Levi, but dammit, he’s just going to roll with it because he’s never been much of a planner.

And no, he totally does _not_ add a heart to the end of Levi’s name in his contacts.


End file.
